TV Spot Pitching Argentine Wine Proves Most Argentinians are White… and Have Been to the Moon

Verdades Cantadas is the title of this 2008 spot promoting the virtues of Argentine wine. Created by Buenos Aires-based ad shop La Negra, the 40-second spot shows Argentinians are not your typical Hispanics. Case in point: they are mostly blond and have been to the moon.

Via: Briefblog

Obama and McCain will have a ‘Sábado Gigante’

Yes, my friends. Hold on to your sombreros, because on Saturday Nov. 1 you’ll be able to see both John McCain and Barack Obama having a blast with none other than Don Francisco himself, during his recently digitally-enhanced Sábado Gigante variety show.

Per a Univision press release: Presidential candidates Senator John McCain and Senator Barack Obama will be profiled and sit down for interviews with “Sábado Gigante” (Gigantic Saturday) host Mario “Don Francisco” Kreutzberger in order to address U.S. Hispanics on Spanish-language television’s longest-running, most popular variety program.

Alas, the interviews will not be live… which is too bad because it would have been great to see the candidates dancing about the set in the arms of some scantily-clad women. Talk about Saturday Night fun!

Wal-Mart Finds Way to Sell Hispanics More Junk

Attention, Hispanic suckers shoppers willing to pay an annual fee to buy groceries: The Sam’s Club division of Wal-Mart Stores Inc. this week said it plans to open a new Mas Club, “that sells products imported from Mexico to cater to Hispanic customers.”

The 143,000-square-foot Más Club will offer fresh produce, meats and seafood, as well as a selection of Hispanic foods and international brands including beverages, spices and candy.

…. which is great, I think, ’cause last time I was in Mexico, everything on display at my local Sam’s Club was Made in China.

(Wal Mart has yet to inform us how Mas Club -sans accent- plans to cater “all Hispanics” with products from Mexico. Will Argentineans finally warm up to good ol’ chilpotle?)

If Only He Could Also Lead McCain…

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So according to this Press TV headline, Obama is leading MacCain (not McCain) in certain Hispanic states [sic.] And one can only wonder if that is how Hispanics in “Hispanic states” really pronounce his name. After all, it sounds more like Mac & Cheese.

Here’s How We Plan to Populate the U.S.

A Queens mother this month gave birth to six healthy (if tiny) babies, in what is believed to be first sextuples ever born to a Hispanic couple in the U.S.

Baby A, a boy, was born at 10:36 a.m.

Three more boys – B, C and D – arrived at 10:38.

Last came the girls – baby E 10:39 and F at 10:40.

Mother, father, and letter-named baby boys and girls are fine -and already thought of as the target of many, many market studies in the years to come. Will they be Spanish-dominant? Bilingual? Bicultural? Bicoastal? Bi-polar? Acculturated? Straight? English-dominant?

Only God, and market research, will tell.

Welcome all, paisanos (and be gentle with the little one on the right. He looks a bit squeezed there!)

No Kidding. Obama Sounds Sexier in Spanish

…and he promises you’ll get a fair share of the American Dream (whatever that means.)

Latino Texas Dude Endorses Obama Condoms

Everything has to be used with moderation, especially these very special condoms, for the “elitist penis” and not for the “typical white guy,” as their marketing pitch establishes. But if a Texan guy called Jorge recommends them, hell, we’d better pay close attention. Here’s what Jorge has to say:

Televisa Wants you to Know [Rich] Mexicans are Recession-Proof

Give us earthquakes, floods, stock market crashes, currency devaluations, terrorist attacks, kidnappings, public beheadings and drug wars… Mexicans can overcome anything… just as long as they are rich and got themselves a juicy long-term contract with the Canal de las Estrellas –Otherwise, you’re pretty much screwed.

(Oh, and in case you were wondering… lots of these telenovela guys have already moved to Miami.)

How to Say Ketchup in [Mexican] Spanish

Photo: Hazme el Chingado Favor

Here’s What Happens When You Order IO en Español

From the creators of the now infamous fake Daddy Yankee commercial comes the latest pitch for Cablevision’s IO en español package.

Hold on to your soccer shorts, your wrestling masks and -of course- your sombreros!

Just When you Thought Spanish-language TV Couldn’t Get Any Better…

Oprah will now be available to you En Español, per a Target Corp.-sponsored agreement to include Secondary Audio Programming (SAP) and close captions in Spanish starting today.

I cannot wait to be muy inspirada!

Who Needs Geico When a Superhero Can Protect your Property?

My fellow chilangos have found a creative (if maybe not infallible) way to protect their property in the face of Mexico City’s alarming insecurity levels.

Translation: This truck is protected by Spider Man.

Photo: Periódico Reforma

Talk About No-Nonsense Political Endorsement

Here’s how ImpreMedia-owned El Diario La Prensa chose to show its endorsement of Sen. Barack Obama. A front page editorial on today’s paper calls for change in the face of the nation’s near-collapse.

McCain Thinks Obama is ‘Very Riesgoso’

McCain has just launched a new TV ad in Spanish calling Obama and his friends as very “risky” (un riesgo) for the nation’s small business owners.

I don’t know you guys, but judging from the picture above, I wouldn’t be so sure as to who is the riskiest loco around.

Gringo Food [and Traditions] Can Be Fatal

In an effort to replicate one of America’s most stupid popular eating challenges, a company in Mexicali, Baja California, offered to give away $5,000 pesos ($450) to the person who could eat as many hamburgers possible in 10 minutes.

One of them didn’t make it. According to La Jornada, 37-year-old Samuel Gallego Sánchez died of asphyxia in front of his family while stuffing himself with hamburgers, a contest organized by local eatery Las Calotonas.

Why the obsession with disgusting food challenges? How about how many books can you read in one month? how many hours can you go without using the net? How many companies can we fine for encouraging people to be fat? Anyone?