Cristina Wants You to Eat M&M’s, Then Drink Water

Barely three weeks after we were told Cristina Saralegui was chosen among a group of Latino celebrities to take part in M&M’s “Inner M” advertising campaign, we find out that Univision’s long-time hostess is now advising Latinos to drink Nestle’s Pure Life bottled water.

“I want to educate Latino moms about the importance of teaching their children healthy habits that will last them a lifetime,” said Saralegui in a press release.

Since Nestle’s campaign is dubbed Vive Sanamente (or Live Healthy,) we can only assume it’s OK for you to stuff yourself with M&M’s, so long as you wash them down with Pure Life bottled water.

A brilliant marketing coup; though if you asked me, I would have rather picked Don Francisco for the water campaign. If one million years on Hispanic TV looking sort of the same (save the dyed hair) are not testament of Pure Life, I don’t know what is.

Just When You Thought There Was Enough Bad Latin Music Out There…

Cuauhtémoc Blanco, the Chicago Fire midfielder has just released a CD-DVD combo, consisting of a narrative of his long 35 years of existence and 16 of his favorite songs… sung by “Cuau” himself. La historia de un ídolo (The History of an Idol) is yet another brilliant idea brought to torture you by Sony BMG.

Beijing Update: Calling on Neicxitapayolhuiliztli Fans

Are you a Náhuatl-speaker but feel the media is not providing you with the appropriate Olympic coverage in the language of your choice?

Worry no more: Starting Aug. 8 you will be able to read all about the Games in the 100 frases básicas del chino para los Juegos Olímpicos de Beijín 2008, a 100-page manual translating some of the world’s most popular sports into the pre-Hispanic language. This is, of course, for those who didn’t know that Tlapechmacuauhtapayolhuiliztli is Náhuatl for ping-pong.

Other useful things to remember:

Boxing=Ma’ixnamiquiliztli

Cycling=Omalacapainaliztli

Gymnastics: Tonacayomoliniliztli

Alas, the manual was not the work of Mexicans, but according to BBC Mundo, it is the brainchild of Dutch professor Rudolf van Zantwijk.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, we will work hard to bring home at least one gold medal, or Cozticteocuitlamachiopilcac.

McCain Wants you to Think He Cares About Latinos…

…and that he is totally obsessed with Obama.

…Oh, and by the way: Can somebody tell McCain that “El mundo de acuerdo a Barack Obama” is an AWFUL, literal translation of what -we think- he means, “El mundo según Barack Obama”? Please, please, tell us he is not that bad!